LESBIAN VS LESBIAN!

ITEM: Dimitris Lambrou, a publisher of a small magazine devoted to ancient-Greek religious issues, has filed a lawsuit against the Homosexual and Lesbian Community of Greece demanding that they remove the term “lesbian” from their name – on account of he lives on the island of Lesbos and is jolly well sick of all the lesbian jokes.

"My sister can't say she's a Lesbian," he complained. "Our geographical designation has been usurped by certain ladies who have no connection whatsoever with Lesbos." That’s why the Greek govt officially refers to Lesbos as Mytilini (the capital city of Lesbos).

It’s easy to make all the obvious jokes (just ask the clever blokes over at The Register), but it’s an interesting dilemma. If yr from Lesbos, yr a Lesbian in the same sense that if yr from Texas, yr a Texan, etc. Imagine if Sappho’s home island had been named Texos (which is not a Greek word, I know, but go with me here) and women who love women were known as Texans, and you get an idea of why Lambrou is annoyed.

That said, the term “lesbian” has been around for longer than Lambrou’s been alive. And if he wins his case, would that set legal precedent for an international injunction? Would they get to put a trademark sign next to it (i.e. Lesbos™ and Lesbian™ are trademark properties of the Island Of Lesbos™, all rights reserved”, etc)?

And here’s a poser: just what are lesbians going to call themselves? Lowercase lesbians? Poetic but too long. Dykes? Nope, then they’ll get sued by some dambuilder’s union. Lesbeterians? They’d need written permission from Judy Tenuta. Scissor Sisters? Taken.

Personally, I think Lambrou will lose. Too much water under the bridge and all. On the other hand, if he wins, I’ll get to refer to all my lesbian friends as lowercase lesbians. Which I find amusing for my own idiosyncratic reasons.

Let’s be friends,

This is dF