DEFCON DANCE PARTY PART 2: AFTER THE BOMBS

So, how’s the Buffalo Bill Apocalypso going for you so far?

It’s over where I live – it may still be going on in yr time zone. Somehow I was expecting something ... I dunno, noisier. Probably Ronnie James Dio's fault I couldn't hear it.

Anyway, as promised, the DEFCON Dance Party continues. Prophets come and go, but the music will never let you down.

Part 1 is here if yr tuning in late (no doubt from spending all day stocking up on bottled water, canned spaghetti and shotguns).

EXTRA CREDIT: Read Go-Go Girls of the Apocalypse by Victor Gischler (out next month).



I’ve never read him, but it has go-go girls, and it comes up when you Google “Apocalypse Buffalo Bill”, so it can’t be a coincidence.

Right?

Apocalypse now,

This is dF

THAT’S RIGHT (YR NOT FROM TEXAS)

But Texas wants you anyway.

Via dydan:

You are 45% REAL Texan!!

Alright, now you're probably Texan or have at least lived here a while. Congrats to you. This summer you will probably be floating the guadulpe, frio or comal, throwin a few light beers back, thanking a supreme almighty for the natural beauty that surrounds you.


How Texan Are You?

Actually, I bluffed my way through most of this, so I guess those six weeks I spent living in El Paso paid off somehow.

And taking advice from Lyle Lovett never hurts either, I suppose.

Deepinahearta Texas,

This is dF

THE CAMPAIGN, IT BEGINS ...

Now that the general election is underway, you’ll be seeing a lot more stuff like this:

Obama campaign: Wife never used the word 'Whitey'

WASHINGTON - Democrat Barack Obama's campaign said Thursday that Michelle Obama never used the word "whitey" in a speech from the church pulpit as it launched a Web site to debunk rumors about him and his wife.

More evidence (if you really needed any) that the real battleground this election will be on the Interwubs. It’ll be ExposeObama.com (started by the guy who gave you the Willie Horton ad) vs Fight The Smears. Opening match: Obama Girl vs Incredible McCain Girl.

No, really.

Seriously, though, I doubt Obama’s “truth” site will be all that effective, because the anti-Obama crowd can just say, “Oh, like you can believe anything a guy named Hussein says.” Team Obama would be better off directing people to a third-party site like FactCheck.

Or maybe not. People believe whatever they want to believe, and the Internet is currently designed to feed that. Whether yr spending all yr time on Newsmax or Daily Kos, all news can be tailored to yr narrow worldview. On sites like those, any rumor will do nicely. It’s not that hard to start a rumor, after all. Watch:

Obama once fondled a white nun while wearing a keffiya with a “72 Virgins? Not for long!” button tacked on it.

McCain has a wireless chip implanted in his brain. It was originally put there to give him on-demand erections, but is now being used by Karl Rove to control him by remote using cell phone towers via warrantless wiretap links authorized by the DOJ.

See? I can do it too. So can you. Weekly World News did it all the time. And don’t get me started on Fox News and their weird “terrorist fist jab” ponderings. Truth is always a casualty in politics, but this year we may see it taken to the next level via the Web. And if it actually works, then all bets are off for the future.

Say anything,

This is dF

THE DRUIDS LIKED THEMSELVES SOME BACON

ITEM [via YesButNoButYes]: And now, for no reason at all, Baconhenge.



Where the demons dwell! Where the banshees live and they do live well!

And so on.

God bless the BaconTubes.

I will show you how,

This is dF