SOME AWARDS ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS

Good morning. It’s Monday and you are the only person in the office not hung over from watching the Oscars. Because honestly, why should you, when Robert Mitchum never got one?

Then again, who needs an Oscar when you’ve got Simone Silva topless on the beach in Cannes?



Cannes do,

This is dF

BREAKING: YOU CAN LEGALLY WATCH R-RATED MOVIES IN INDIANA

ITEM: Southern Indiana prosecutor Stan Levco announces that he has decided not to file criminal charges against stores in Vanderburgh County hosting DVD rental kiosks like Redbox for distributing “harmful matter” to minors in the form of any movie that doesn’t have a “G” rating.

In January, Levco's office sent letters to stores like Walmart, Schnucks and Walgreens that have a Redbox or similar machines on their property.

He says he asked them to stop renting R rated movies or he would consider filing charges.

An excerpt from the letter:

"We suggest that the machine or machines dispensing these materials at your location no longer provide access to videos, movies, games" and other material that are unrated or have ratings of R or even PG, the letter says.

Levco now says he believes a trial against Redbox and other movie kiosk owners would be a waste of his resources and that a non-guilty verdict would be returned.

I’m sure the fact that Redbox requires a credit card – which (I assume) most American kids don’t have – was a factor.

All of which is worth mentioning partly because Levco was initially proposing to classify any film rated PG or higher as “harmful matter” (which in Indiana would mean that letting yr kid watch any such film could technically be a Class D felony), but also because the whole cockamamy idea came from another lawyer who represents several local video store owners who didn’t like the competition.

In other words, they were basically invoking the “protect the children” argument for censorship as a ploy to take business away from Redbox by limiting consumer choices.

And people say I’M cynical.

Out of the box,

This is dF

CLAP FOR THE WOLFMAN b/w ALICE GOES GREEK

I didn’t watch the Oscars, no. (And yes, they did broadcast them live here, and yes, I would have been able to watch it, as I’m working from home today.)

But I HAVE been to the movies recently. Brace yrselves.

The Wolfman

Just what we needed, another remake of a Hollywood classic ... only I have to say, there’s a lot to like about this one. Benicio del Toro, for one, who really nails Lawrence Talbot as a tragic character. Also worth mentioning is that it’s refreshing to see a monster movie that doesn’t drown itself it in over-the-top CGI (except for the London rooftop bit). Bonus points for that.

The only real problem with it is that we’ve heard this story a hundred times, and the one mild twist they add to the plot isn’t really enough to justify it. It’s basically the same film with a bigger budget and a LOT more gore effects. It doesn’t help that the dialogue is pretty stiff.

Still, as remakes go, this is better than I expected, and certainly better than a lot of other remakes out there. It’s a good film – just not an essential one.

Alice In Wonderland

Tim Burton’s take on the Lewis Carroll classic – or rather, an extension of it, implying early on that Wonderland is a place Alice has been to before but thinks it was just a dream. Like a lot of Burton’s recent work, it’s visually amazing but doesn’t really engage me compared to his earlier films.

It’s not bad, mind – I like Alice as a contrarian female in Victorian England, and for my money Helena Bonham Carter actually steals the show from Johnny Depp as the Red Queen. And the Cheshire Cat is still the coolest character in the story.

But for all that, it still looks like a CGI-rich excuse for Burton to out-quirk himself with the usual visual madness to the point where it starts to get in the way, possibly from Burton just trying too hard.

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief

The Harry Potter comparisons are too easy, and probably unfair (it’s not as though JK Rowling invented the “nerd boy discovers his awesome secret heritage and superpowers” story, and Rick Riordan came up with the idea for Percy Jackson before the first Harry Potter book came out), but the film version does come across as Harry Potter for Americans (and Greek mythology fans).

Overall, it’s pretty much aimed squarely at the same age group. And I admit if I was 15 when this film came out, I’d have loved it (not least because I was a Mythology nerd too – cheers, Ray Harryhausen! – and some of it was filmed in Nashville).

As a crabby middle-aged bloke, though, there’s not much here for me. It’s okay for what it is, but there’s too many plot holes (why Greek gods live in the USA is anyone's guess) and not enough cleverness to make it really engaging.

Myth takes,

This is dF