THE TRUTH (WITH DICK JOKES)

Yr dream headline of the day:

 

Republicans turned off by size of Obama's package

And the innuendo doesn’t stop there:
 

Republicans are not sparing the rod when it comes to beating up on President Obama’s economic stimulus package, but it’s clear they are unable to raise their membership to withstand the newly found vigor of his congressional muscle.

President Obama’s massive $819 billion spending-and-tax-cut package was rammed through the U.S. House of Representatives on Wednesday without the support of a single Republican member. Even with 11 Democratic representatives opposing the bill, the 244-to-188 count reflected the bulging Democratic majority that has now swollen the House.

Whatever you think of Obama’s healthcare plan, you have to admire the ability of Tom Brandt to take the “package size” joke and running with it for pretty much the entire article. He clearly had a lot of fun writing this.

George Carlin would be proud (see last paragraph).

Size matters,

This is dF

IT WASN’T A PRETTY PICTURE

Over on the Facebooks, some days they have theme memes. Today, I hear, the object is to post a pretty picture.

This was my contribution to the Facebook hive mind.

"Janet Jackson - Rhythm Nation" (Watch on YouTube)

Because someone has to do it. Plus, clearly a vast portion of the population is not getting nearly enough Social Distortion in their diet.

Mommy’s little monster,

This is dF

FULL ACRE CRISIS GARDEN!

You’ll need one when the Obamapocalypse comes. That’s why you need to send $149 to the Survival Seed Bank.

As seen on Glenn Beck.

Here’s why you need a Crisis Garden:

You don't have to be an Old Testament prophet to see what's going on all around us. A belligerent lower class demanding handouts. A rapidly diminishing middle class crippled by police state bureaucracy. An aloof, ruling elite that has introduced us to an emerging totalitarianism which seeks control over every aspect of our lives.

As the meltdown progresses, one of the first things to be affected will be our nation's food supply. Expect soaring prices along with moderate to severe shortages by spring. If you don't have the ability to grow your own food next year, your life may be in danger. Supply lines for food distribution in this country are about three days, meaning a dependence on "just in time" distribution systems, which will leave store shelves empty in the event of even the smallest crisis.

The whole spiel is worth reading – it’s a masterpiece of paranoid apocalyptic fantasy marketing, especially the part that explains that if you wait for the Food Apocalypse before buying these seeds, it’s probably already too late.

Not that I’m against growing yr own food (especially now that doing so is apparently a political statement whether you intended it to be or not).

Still, it occurs to me that when the Food Apocalypse comes, cityfolk will be totally screwed.

Except Detroit.

Ironically.

(Nothing but) flowers,

This is dF