MY ROD AND STAFF SHALL COMFORT THEE, BABY

ITEM: Catholic churchgoers in Oklahoma are outraged over a 10-foot crucifix that they claim shows Jesus with a big Jesus-sized erection.

Like so.



Oh my.

The punchline is that it’s a San Damiano crucifix, which has been around since the 12th century. Those are Jesus’ abs and they’re supposed to look like that.

Personally, I suspect it’s a case of people seeing what they want to see, which says a lot more about them than it does about the artist what made the crucifix.

Of course, now I can’t look at a San Damiano crucifix without seeing cock, so who am I to be critical? 

Not that that’s a bad thing. I’m just saying.

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord,

This is dF

IN A PERFECT COPYRIGHT WORLD, WE’RE ALL CONSUMERS AND SUSPECTS

ITEM: America’s first Intellectual Property czar, Victoria Espinel – head of the Intellectual Property Enforcement Coordinator office created under the Pro-IP Act of 2008 – has been seeking comments on how to set up a "Joint Strategic Plan" for copyright enforcement.

The Motion Picture Association of America (MPAA) and the Recording Industry Association of America (RIAA) have submitted a joint wish list of enforcement capabilities. They include:

1. Spyware for computers that would detect unauthorized copies of music and video files and then either delete them or perhaps simply report you to the police.

2. Requiring ISPs and service providers to actively filter their tubes networks for pirated content.

3. Putting anti-piracy propaganda at immigration checkpoints and adding a question on customs declaration forms asking you if you have any illegal tracks on yr laptop or iPod.

4. Putting countries the US perceives as lax on strict copyright enforcement on a watch list that would affect the ability of ISPs in those countries to send traffic to and from the US regardless of how much of it is illegal.

5. Having the FBI assign agents to blockbuster movie releases to watch out for pre-release leaks and catch whoever leaked it.

The EFF has a good rundown of why these ideas are either overboard or unworkable, but the list is instructive of the mindset that the MPAA and RIAA have towards copyright infringement and how they would enforce it if they had their way.

The requests sound mild as written, but practical application of them could easily lead to a situation where yr devices will be used to spy on yr music/video/surfing activity and take action against you, border guards have a right to search yr devices for pirated material, ISPs must create a content firewall that keeps “illegal” content out of yr hands and crackdowns on other countries that don’t play ball.

And once the mechanisms are in place to control content consumption, who gets to decide what's legal or illegal content? The RIAA? The DOJ? The DHS?

Whether it would actually come to that is of course debatable. But I do think it’s important to understand where the music and film industry stands on this issue, because it’s their mentality of “This is our content, not yrs, and you will only consume it in ways we approve, and BTW Fair Use is liberal bullshit” that informs their business model and their lobbying tactics.

And woe is you if they get their way.

On the bright side, we can all be Johnny Depp.

Yr utopia = my dystopia,

This is dF