MERRYMAKING AT MY PLACE

[Cross-posting from thewhyfive, where I've been slack lately ...]

MISSION: List the Top Five People (Dead Or Alive) You'd Bring To Dinner

DISCLAIMER: I’m a big believer in the “Kill yr idols” axiom, which says that you should never meet people you idolize unless you want to be terribly disappointed when you see what they’re really like. Still, there’s some people I’d take a chance on, though my selections are based on the likelihood that we’d actually have something to talk about besides work (if you get what I mean).

Of course, I could just say The Fab Five from Queer Eye, but that’s just lazy. Though I’d certainly learn a lot.

TOP FIVE OPEN DINNER INVITATIONS

1. Bettie Page
Because she’s a homegirl. And I’ve seen her naked, obviously, so dinner is the least I can do.

2. Douglas Adams
Because we’d have a good time jabbering about technology.

3. Kylie Minogue
Because she’s probably the most accessible pop star on the planet. And she’d be nice enough to laugh at my stupid jokes.

4. Tom Waits
Because he tells the best stories ever.

5. Louis Armstrong
Same thing.

Honorable mentions: Christopher Walken, Samuel L Jackson, Bill Hicks, Alice Cooper, Pet Shop Boys, Shonen Knife, The Weather Girls, and probably a bunch of other people I’m forgetting.

Pass the salt,

This is dF

DON’T POD ME, BRO!

ITEM: Unveiled at CES in Vegas this week: a Taser with a built-in MP3 player. Or, if you like, an MP3 player with a Taser function.



It’s for girls, you know:

The company says the new device is aimed at women. It would encourage purchases by women who want a form of self defence while they were out jogging, but would otherwise take an iPod or MP3 player rather than a weapon.

Also suitable for police who like to consolidate their accessories. Like they do in New South Wales, evidently. Because zapping unruly perps with 50,000 volts is so much more satisfying when you've got Metallica playing in yr head.

Or maybe Electric Light Orchestra. Or The Electric Prunes. Or Shocking Blue. Or Michelle Shocked. Or ... oh, you know.

Short sharp shocked,

This is dF