MY MUSTACHE IS THE VENGEANCE

Remember Hall and Oates?



Of course you do. Guess what?



Pilot episode:

John Oates is opening a new wing of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame that focuses on mustachioed musicians. Suddenly, a dying David Crosby appears and with his last breath warns Oates of a mysterious secret group of mustache wearers bent on killing other mustache wearers. As actor Tom Selleck attempts to escape from the latest murder scene, Oates summons his own mustache with a fist pump that simultaneously changes his clothes from conservative attire to pink pants and white boots.

What, no Flaming Mullet of Justice?

I can’t go for that (no can do),

This is dF

THE GREAT AMERICAN LINGERIE NOVEL

I hereby declare my candidacy for NaNoWriMo 2008.

Technically I probably have no right to do so, since I’m still trying to bash a reasonable first draft out of my first NNWM “winner" in 2005 (Planet Of The Bulls).

But why not? NNWM is as good a place as any to test-drive ideas and see where they go. Besides, I’ve got a cracker of an idea this year:



Yes! An epic tale of secret treaties, space exploration and gratuitous lingerie engineering! With added Martians!

That Pulitzer is as good as mine.

FUN FACT: I did a movie poster because the idea was originally meant to be a B-movie screenplay. Which is why I’m billing the novel as “the novelization of the screenplay of the future cult classic B-movie!”

So yes, it’s an idea I’ve had floating in my head for awhile (after reading some news story somewhere about the need to design a bra for female astronauts that works in a lower gravity environment like Mars once we establish colonies and stuff – which sounded like perfect B-movie fodder to me). I’ve been developing a plot line for the last couple of weeks and it’s fallen together surprisingly well – especially once I started referencing a lot of Blue Oyster Cult, Russ Meyer and Ed Wood, Jr.

So we’ll see how it goes. Watch this space for updates as usual. Meanwhile, those of you also doing NNWM, feel free to add me as a writing buddy if you haven’t already and I’ll return the favor. And those of you who aren’t, feel free to be Stewie to my Brian.

Also, anyone who wants to be technical advisor for bra engineering, feel free to jump in at any time.

FULL DISCLOSURE: My NNWM track record thus far.

2005
Planet of the Bulls
Technical win (hit 50k words but didn’t reach the end of the story and have since rewritten it three times)

2006
Morphine Meconate Monkey God
Technical win (really it was just me pretending to be William Burroughs by editing random spam text into a narrative, but there’s no easier way to hit 50k words, and it was a fun experiment)

2007
Did not enter (I was traveling for half that month and didn’t have a prayer)

Typing not writing,

This is dF