HOLY DIVER: YR DOING IT WRONG

[defrog]

ITEM: A Wisconsin man is charged with assault after beating up a guy in a karaoke bar for a substandard performance of Dio’s “Holy Diver”.

Which is just wrong. You don’t beat up a guy because he can’t sing like Ronnie James Dio. You set him on fire. Or hack him apart with a flaming Claymore. Or perhaps both.

Just kidding. And be fair: Dio songs are hard to sing correctly, let alone well.

Also, the victim claims it wasn't his singing that set the guy off but the fact that he responded to the heckling by making fun of his heavy metal crucifix:

"I told him he should find a better vending machine for his jewelry," Mischler recalled.

See? And you thought karaoke bars were for housewives and little girls.

FUN FACT: A year and a half ago, a man was punched out by a woman who thought his karaoke version of a Coldplay song "really sucked”. My first thought: how could you tell?

HOMEWORK: For reference, here’s how to do “Holy Diver” correctly.

Fire is optional. The sword is mandatory.

Diver down,

This is dF

Comments

[def-fr0g-42.livejournal.com]

BLOGGING RULE #21:

When in doubt, Dio.