MISS UNIVERSE ENJOYS GITMO, SPANKING AND NASCAR

[defrog]

For those of you wondering, “Where is dEFROG’s April Fool’s post?”, the answer is: I don’t have one.

At least, I don’t think I do.

To explain: we don’t have AFD here in Hong Kong, or really anywhere outside of the US and the UK. And while I appreciate a practical joke as much as the next person, the fact is most AFD hoax stories aren’t funny, and have lost their impact ever since The Onion went online. I mean, what’s the point?

(Although The Telegraph’s story about how govt scientists have discovered how to convert swimming fish into electricity is pretty good.)

The other problem is that in the 21st Century, where real life is getting weirder every day, it’s getting harder to know when a story is a prank or not.

Here, I’ll show you.

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING STORIES IS FAKE?

1. From New Scientist: Two studies of hormonal changes associated with BDSM play find that spanking, bondage and flogging helps bring consenting couples closer together.

2. From Reuters: Reigning Miss Universe Dayana Mendoza visits Guantanamo Bay and blogs: "It was a loooot of fun!”

3. From Car And Driver: President Obama bans Chevrolet and Dodge from sponsoring NASCAR events as part of his auto industry bailout plan.

Officially, the answer is (3), although an awful lot of NASCAR fans didn’t realize it. They were pissed at Obama for meddling with NASCAR, and now they’re pissed at Car And Driver for running such an "irresponsible" story. I guess it’s hard to have a sense of humor about NASCAR when Kyle Busch wins every year. (I wrote that for bluesgirly .)

On the other hand, I’m still not convinced that the Miss Universe “I heart Gitmo” story is for real. The official MissU site has removed the post and explained that she was talking about the part of Gitmo that isn’t the torture camp detention facility. Whether it's real or not, it probably won't stop Rush Limbaugh from saying, "See? I told you people years ago that Gitmo was practically Club Med!"

And while we’re at it, I’m not 100% sure the New Scientist BDSM study is on the level either – though it wouldn’t surprise me if it is. Personal experience and all.

Honorable mention to the Conficker virus, which was real, but the way the non-tech media cheerfully milked the story for all it was worth as the new Y2K that will destroy the motherf***ing Internet and take yr bank account with it, it might as well have been a hoax. Threat Level’s hilarious coverage of the Interweb Conficker meltdown speaks volumes.

Won’t get fooled again,

This is dF

Comments

[jasonfranks.livejournal.com]

We have AFD in Australia, too. I ignore it.

Regarding the Conficker virus--some people asked me about it and were puzzled that I didn't have much to say about it. "But don't you work in network security?"

The answer is technically 'no', since I am unemployed... but even if it wasn't, most of the threats that receive sudden publicity are just the same old bullshit. If a worm or a trojan is date sensitive and you know about it in advance how much of a threat can it be? Everybody runs some kind of AV software now; if you get caught out you're probably an idiot.

Truth is, if there was a really serious threat you wouldn't know about it until it was too late. The nastiest of nasties you'll never find until you notice the money in your bank account has mysteriously been wired to a private bank in the Ukraine.

-- JF

[def-fr0g-42.livejournal.com]

I saw a report on Conficker via ABC News (the US one) last night, and it was jaw-droppingly OTT on the fear factor, even though technically there's nothing really new about the attack that I'm aware of (buffer overflow is like, what, 20 years old now?), and for the most part can be thwarted by the same old tactics. But then 90% of ABC's audience doesn't know any of that, so I guess it's easier to scare than inform.

[thelastaerie.livejournal.com]

I read about the Miss Universe blog, so I know that's not a hoax. Well, something to make that Miss Teen USA looks slightly "normal" as far as beauty queens go...