DEF KL ENTRAPMENT TOUR 2009, PART 2: THIS LAND IS NOT FOR SALE

So stop asking me.



[Spotted near the hotel]

The great thing about sitting through four straight days of PowerPoint marathons only three hours sleep whilst meeting grueling deadlines is that, after awhile, yr notes start looking like this:

Dulcet tones of Link OAM certification procedures lull me into strange visions, most of them involving the Hack Girls running on stage, giving lap dances and eating popsicles as the speakers moan low. Which would be the case of Chuck Barris ran these conferences. I wish he did. Then we could have Jaye P Morgan, Charles Nelson Reilly and Paul Lynde as panelists, rating the speakers and smoking cigarettes.

Ooooo brain fade ... multipath agents are jamming my brain again. Burroughs is dicing my brain and reassembling the cubes randomly out of a stainless steel bowl – “Mosaic brainprint, you dig?” he growls amiably.

“End to end monitoring of service to ensure 99.9999999999999% uptime.” Am I the only one reading double entendres into that slide? Probably all the coffee. More than three mugs in one hour and I got a fever, and the prescription is Dita von Teese in a Wonderbra whacking a cowbell. Klunk! Klunk! Klunk! Klunk!

“We’re losing them, AJ.”

“Send out Susan Tyrell, Herve Villechaize and the Mystic Knights Of The Oingo Boingo.”

“Can't do it. No smoking in the ballroom, chief."

"Goddammit I can’t be expected to work under these conditions.”

We are all giant Komodo dragons, only with shoes.

Multipoint to multipoint to multipoint to multipoint to multipoint to multipoint to multipoint! Water flowing underground! I has a hunger! Bring me nasi goreng! And a masseuse!

Good thing they thought to supply us with extra large coffee mugs. No idea why they held the conference in a meat locker. The ink in my pen kept crystalizing.

Right. Back to work, then.

Ball and chain,

This is dF

I’M READING AS FAST AS I CAN: NOVEMBER 2009 EDITION

I read books. You read book reports. Nuff said.

JUST FINISHED

Oryx and Crake by Margaret Atwood
Post-apocalyptic fiction in which the apparent sole human survivor, left in charge of a group of genetically engineered people, recalls the events leading up to the catastrophe, from his life growing up within the sealed-off multinational corporation compounds to the love triangle between himself, his best friend Crake and a woman named Oryx. In some ways the flashbacks read like a typical dysfunctional family drama, only set in a dystopian future where yr only as useful as the multinationals see fit, but it’s a pretty rich imagining of what would happen if corporate power, especially in the biotech sector, was left unchecked. The bits about kiddie porn are too much of a stretch for me, though. Apart from that, it’s pretty convincing.

JUST STARTED

Wise Blood by Flannery O’Connor
I’ve only read a few short stories of O’Connor’s (in high school, yes), and I admit I only considered this because I found out Ministry sampled dialogue from the film version (which I haven’t seen) for “Jesus Built My Hot Rod”. But the synopsis about a man determined to start a church that doesn’t believe in Jesus (and another zealot determined to get him a new one) sounds like the kind of thing I should be reading in these weird times. So why not?

( Recent titles? I has them. )

I need lunch,

This is dF