MORE SENSELESS ACTS OF BLOGGERY

I’m back from Kuala Lumpur.

Not much to report, except for the following:

1. PowerPoint

I spent a lot of time looking at PowerPoint slides.

2. Landmarks

When I wasn’t looking at PowerPoint slides, I was looking at the Petronas Twin Towers. Which look like this.

 


Sean Connery and Catherine Zeta-Jones not included.

3. Bookstores

When I wasn’t looking at PowerPoint slides or the Petronas Twin Towers, I was inside a very large Kinokuniya bookstore trying desperately not to buy too many books. I kept it to two selections. You’ll find out what they are one day if you keep following this blog long enough.

4. Television wasteland

One of the speakers at the conference I went to was from NBC Universal. That meant we got to see a short video showcasing all of their hit TV shows, cable news channels and Hollywood blockbusters. I was impressed because it pretty much summed up everything about American television that keeps me from watching it whenever I’m in the country.

I know it’s a mistake to assume that media is an accurate and comprehensive reflection of a given country, but I always imagine aliens seeing something like that as a capsule of American culture and thinking, “What a bunch of rubes.”

5. Penang chicken curry

I had some Penang chicken curry, because I likes me some Penang chicken curry. I did not like this particular Penang chicken curry. It didn’t like me back.

6. Huge doughnuts

I also had a raspberry doughnut from the café in the lobby. It was the size of a Whopper. I ate the hell out of it.

7. Petty crime

Kuala Lumpur International Airport owes me 6 ringgit. That’s how much I paid for a bottle of water that I thought I could take on the plane back to HK with me but, as it turns out, couldn’t. I’ll bet another 6 ringgit the security guard who confiscated it was secretly thinking, “Cool, I just saved me 6 ringgit.”

Lesson: airport security is a racket.

That’s all from me. Next week: Seven things about Santa Clara, California.

No deposit no return,

This is dF

And it’s so long to Kuala Lumpur. And as mentioned earlier, I was too busy to really go out and see anything interesting. I did have some nice local food nearby the hotel, but that’s about it.

Oh, one new thing to report since the last time I was here: they scan and file yr index fingerprints at immigration checkpoints now.

I could go on about privacy and human rights, but really, Malaysia's just following other people's examples. The US has been fingerprinting foreigners since 2004. So hey, it must be okay, right? So what if it’s a dumb and inefficient way to catch illegal immigrants, terrorists and other criminals?

Hell, these days Walt Disney World fingerprints its own customers. As do Welsh nightclubs. And Australian ones. Fingerprinting is the New Normal. 

Besides, between my Army stint, my Hong Kong ID card, my FBI file and my unsavory past, my fingerprints have been on file in govt databases since the 80s. So now I have fingerprint files in three (3) countries.

Progress!

Yr in suspiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicion,

This is dF

Back in Hong Kong. And glad to be here.

Nothing against Kuala Lumpur, of course. But I saw very little of it anyway, apart from three hotels, the shopping mall between them, the elevated monorail and, of course the Towers.

Which I managed to get a closer look at.



Here’s some other highlights.

 

 

That Space Needle thing? That’s the KL Tower. Which looks kind of like a UFO when the weather's all misty in the morning. I like that.

Anyway, that’s all I got. I spent too much time in hotel ballrooms and suites taking notes or typing like a madman. And I’ve still got one more 2,000-word article to write by Monday morning. After that, I can sleep.

Probably.

Caffeinated,

This is dF

For those of you who doubt I’m in Kuala Lumpur, here’s the view outside my window.



Them’s the Petronas Towers. As seen in the film Entrapment. Sean Connery and Catherine Zeta-Jones not included.

You’ll be seeing more of them throughout this series, as I’m not likely to be going anywhere else in KL, thanks to my punishing work ethic. Indeed, I’ve been lucky to get out of the hotel at all. I’ll only be getting out tomorrow because I have to go to another conference in a different hotel.

Probably as well. It’s been raining for much of my limited free time anyway.

You envy me, I know.

Inside man,

This is dF