2007: AN APPRECIATION
Jan. 2nd, 2008 05:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
defrogTime to fill out the old Year End Bloggery Review meme, and in the usual fashion, I shall exceed my mandate by posting the first AND last headline/first sentence of each month.
PRODUCTION NOTE: Entries from January to October 2007 glommed from the 1.0 version of this blog, which, you’ll recall, was shut down by DHS agents.
LISTEN TO MY FIRST WORDS OF 2007
Royalty sucks. Even when yr Chow Yun-fat.
AVRIL LAVIGNE IS THE NEW COURTNEY LOVE
Avril Lavigne is launching her own comic book.
REASONS WE’RE LOSING THE WAR ON TERRORISM #76: AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE FREAKS OUT BOSTON
[Oh for CHRIST’S sake...]
YOUTUBE SURVIVOR SERIES #16: HE’S AN EMOTIONAL MAN
Because you people are clearly not getting enough Falco in yr diet, I am prescribing his “Sound Of Musik” video.
CLOSE YR EYES AND THINK OF JAPAN
ITEM: Japanese men who refuse to give the Oral Pleasure to their girlfriends/wives are destroying the country.
WHAT I DIDN’T SEE IN BARCELONA
Or, “This is the kind of stuff dEFROG finds when he’s digging through his disorganized desk looking for a copy of his marriage certificate”.
KEVLAR®: FEAR IS OUR BUSINESS. AND BUSINESS IS GOOD.™
Scores of worried parents in the UK are buying body armor for their children as street violence escalates.
PLEASE REMOVE YR PANTS AND JACKET
The Smoking Gun has uploaded, for yr pleasure, an FBI training video on the “proper” way to conduct a strip-search.
THIS AIN'T NO DISCO
Live from the new & improved waterfront @ Disco Bay. It's Labour Day, so we are having fruit based drinks @ Hemingways with friends. We have sun, Bob Marley on the PA, and drunk white daytrippers next to us, throwing water bottles and speaking in fake stereotypical Japanese accents.
STEAL THIS BLOG
Your Score: Cat Burglar
You scored 89% Subtlety, 25% Leadership, and 96% Forethought!
52 PIGS (#15 OF 52): SEX PIG, ISN’T IT NICE...
This week: inflatable love pigs.
dF08: FENCES ARE BULLSHIT
HONG KONG (PR NEWSWIRE) – Following rumors originating from Newsmax that presidential candidate and Team Frog International® John dEFROG of the Go To Hell Party secretly funded a national television ad demanding that Congress build the Mexican Wall, Mr dEFROG issued the following statement: “Bullshit!”
WHO WANTS IPHONES?
As both a presidential candidate and the editor of Mobile Telephones! magazine, I get a lot of questions regarding this new, new thing called the iPhone, which you may have heard of, and which went on sale yesterday in the US.
JESUS BUILT MY HOT WHEELS®
From the middle of August, Wal-Mart, the biggest toy retailer in the US, will for the first time stock a full line of faith-based toys.
LIPSTICK LESBIANS FOR RON PAUL
I said this before, but it’s worth repeating: forget debate questions. The real impact of YouTube and similar video-sharing sites on elections will be unauthorized campaign ads
WHEN YOU SAID “WAR ON DRUGS”, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT ...
Fascinating IHT op-ed on the British Medical Association’s recent report on “tactical pharmacology”, which warns about the militarization of medicine and its potential for new forms of warfare.
WHEN YOU SAID “WAR ON PORN”, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT ...
A Pentagon panel decided this week that the sale of Playboy and Penthouse can continue on US military bases, ruling that their contents are not "sexually explicit”, and thus do not violate the 1996 Military Honor and Decency Act.
HAVE A BEER WITH FEAR #8: GOOD MORNING, SINNERS
Yr weekly shot of Fear. Because someone’s got to wake uppuffdoggydaddy on the weekend...
BECAUSE EVERYONE NEEDS A 404
THIS BLOG HAS BEEN SUSPENDED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE UNDER THE AUTHORITY OF THE PATRIOT ACT DUE TO NATIONAL SECURITY CONCERNS.
WHERE THE PENCIL MEETS THE EYE
Or, “Best Halloween-themed office supply product EVER!”
THE DAY WE ALL STOPPED LIVING AND BECAME MIXED UP ZOMBIES
If anyone’s planning to take in a zombie flick later tonight, Cracked.com has helpfully compiled five reasons why a zombie apocalypse is actually scientifically plausible. You know, in case yr sitting there thinking, “Yeah, like that’s ever gonna happen.”
KITSAP! THEY CAN REALLY GET DOWN THERE
I’ve just had the most wonderful time scrolling through the Code 911 section of the Kitsap Sun, the official newspaper of Kitsap County, WA.
DEF XMAS PLAYLIST #1: FATHER CHRISTMAS, GIVE US SOME MONEY
Let’s start off with a tune that really captures the true spirit of Christmas – in this case, Santa getting mugged by street punks – courtesy of The Kinks.
LISTEN TO MY LAST WORDS OF 2007
The Fly: The Opera – directed by David Cronenberg
EXECUTIVE SUMMARY: All up, 2007 wasn’t that great a year. Two deaths in the family, money issues, a challenging work situation and That Incident at work that resulted in the blog change. Plus, my first presidential bid wasn’t as successful as I’d hoped – I think even Al Goldstein was polling higher than me by the end.
And I still haven’t achieved my goal of becoming the most influential novelist since William Gibson.
And of course, Planet Earth continued to spiral down the Fear Drain, thanks in no small part to Republicans living in an alternate reality, and Democrats being too polite to tell them this to their face. War, torture, fear, wiretapping, border fences, school shootings, fear, tasers, steroids, Creation science, and the whereabouts of Britney Spears’ panties – that was 2007, mostly. What fun!
Or am I being too negative? Maybe. But when you’ve reached the point where pie is a suspected weapon, using laser pointers can get you arrested, Creation science claims man once co-habited with dinosaurs, the RIAA says that if you make one copy of a song for yrself, yr a criminal, and the biggest albums of 2007 are from Disney TV soundtracks, game show contestants and Nickelback, I think I’m entitled.
Meanwhile, here in 2008, Team Bush will still be in charge of the free world, the Democrats will still be spineless, and the news media will still be run by the sort of people who run Dateline. So not much to look forward to. Unless you thrive on outrage and run a blog. Then it’s going to be a productive 12 months.
I think I’m turning into George Carlin, personally. I think I’m going to reach a point where I just decide to cancel my membership to the human race, sit back and just enjoy the show – and blog the highlights.
Or maybe I’ll just keep posting YouTube videos and sex robot innovations. Always in motion is the future.
Better luck next year,
This is dF
PRODUCTION NOTE: Entries from January to October 2007 glommed from the 1.0 version of this blog, which, you’ll recall, was shut down by DHS agents.
JANUARY 2007
LISTEN TO MY FIRST WORDS OF 2007
Royalty sucks. Even when yr Chow Yun-fat.
AVRIL LAVIGNE IS THE NEW COURTNEY LOVE
Avril Lavigne is launching her own comic book.
FEBRUARY 2007
REASONS WE’RE LOSING THE WAR ON TERRORISM #76: AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE FREAKS OUT BOSTON
[Oh for CHRIST’S sake...]
YOUTUBE SURVIVOR SERIES #16: HE’S AN EMOTIONAL MAN
Because you people are clearly not getting enough Falco in yr diet, I am prescribing his “Sound Of Musik” video.
MARCH 2007
CLOSE YR EYES AND THINK OF JAPAN
ITEM: Japanese men who refuse to give the Oral Pleasure to their girlfriends/wives are destroying the country.
WHAT I DIDN’T SEE IN BARCELONA
Or, “This is the kind of stuff dEFROG finds when he’s digging through his disorganized desk looking for a copy of his marriage certificate”.
APRIL 2007
KEVLAR®: FEAR IS OUR BUSINESS. AND BUSINESS IS GOOD.™
Scores of worried parents in the UK are buying body armor for their children as street violence escalates.
PLEASE REMOVE YR PANTS AND JACKET
The Smoking Gun has uploaded, for yr pleasure, an FBI training video on the “proper” way to conduct a strip-search.
MAY 2007
THIS AIN'T NO DISCO
Live from the new & improved waterfront @ Disco Bay. It's Labour Day, so we are having fruit based drinks @ Hemingways with friends. We have sun, Bob Marley on the PA, and drunk white daytrippers next to us, throwing water bottles and speaking in fake stereotypical Japanese accents.
STEAL THIS BLOG
Your Score: Cat Burglar
You scored 89% Subtlety, 25% Leadership, and 96% Forethought!
JUNE 2007
52 PIGS (#15 OF 52): SEX PIG, ISN’T IT NICE...
This week: inflatable love pigs.
dF08: FENCES ARE BULLSHIT
HONG KONG (PR NEWSWIRE) – Following rumors originating from Newsmax that presidential candidate and Team Frog International® John dEFROG of the Go To Hell Party secretly funded a national television ad demanding that Congress build the Mexican Wall, Mr dEFROG issued the following statement: “Bullshit!”
JULY 2007
WHO WANTS IPHONES?
As both a presidential candidate and the editor of Mobile Telephones! magazine, I get a lot of questions regarding this new, new thing called the iPhone, which you may have heard of, and which went on sale yesterday in the US.
JESUS BUILT MY HOT WHEELS®
From the middle of August, Wal-Mart, the biggest toy retailer in the US, will for the first time stock a full line of faith-based toys.
AUGUST 2007
LIPSTICK LESBIANS FOR RON PAUL
I said this before, but it’s worth repeating: forget debate questions. The real impact of YouTube and similar video-sharing sites on elections will be unauthorized campaign ads
WHEN YOU SAID “WAR ON DRUGS”, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT ...
Fascinating IHT op-ed on the British Medical Association’s recent report on “tactical pharmacology”, which warns about the militarization of medicine and its potential for new forms of warfare.
SEPTEMBER 2007
WHEN YOU SAID “WAR ON PORN”, I THOUGHT YOU MEANT ...
A Pentagon panel decided this week that the sale of Playboy and Penthouse can continue on US military bases, ruling that their contents are not "sexually explicit”, and thus do not violate the 1996 Military Honor and Decency Act.
HAVE A BEER WITH FEAR #8: GOOD MORNING, SINNERS
Yr weekly shot of Fear. Because someone’s got to wake up
puffdoggydaddy on the weekend...OCTOBER 2007
BECAUSE EVERYONE NEEDS A 404
THIS BLOG HAS BEEN SUSPENDED UNTIL FURTHER NOTICE UNDER THE AUTHORITY OF THE PATRIOT ACT DUE TO NATIONAL SECURITY CONCERNS.
WHERE THE PENCIL MEETS THE EYE
Or, “Best Halloween-themed office supply product EVER!”
NOVEMBER 2007
THE DAY WE ALL STOPPED LIVING AND BECAME MIXED UP ZOMBIES
If anyone’s planning to take in a zombie flick later tonight, Cracked.com has helpfully compiled five reasons why a zombie apocalypse is actually scientifically plausible. You know, in case yr sitting there thinking, “Yeah, like that’s ever gonna happen.”
KITSAP! THEY CAN REALLY GET DOWN THERE
I’ve just had the most wonderful time scrolling through the Code 911 section of the Kitsap Sun, the official newspaper of Kitsap County, WA.
DECEMBER 2007
DEF XMAS PLAYLIST #1: FATHER CHRISTMAS, GIVE US SOME MONEY
Let’s start off with a tune that really captures the true spirit of Christmas – in this case, Santa getting mugged by street punks – courtesy of The Kinks.
LISTEN TO MY LAST WORDS OF 2007
The Fly: The Opera – directed by David Cronenberg
EXECUTIVE SUMMARY: All up, 2007 wasn’t that great a year. Two deaths in the family, money issues, a challenging work situation and That Incident at work that resulted in the blog change. Plus, my first presidential bid wasn’t as successful as I’d hoped – I think even Al Goldstein was polling higher than me by the end.
And I still haven’t achieved my goal of becoming the most influential novelist since William Gibson.
And of course, Planet Earth continued to spiral down the Fear Drain, thanks in no small part to Republicans living in an alternate reality, and Democrats being too polite to tell them this to their face. War, torture, fear, wiretapping, border fences, school shootings, fear, tasers, steroids, Creation science, and the whereabouts of Britney Spears’ panties – that was 2007, mostly. What fun!
Or am I being too negative? Maybe. But when you’ve reached the point where pie is a suspected weapon, using laser pointers can get you arrested, Creation science claims man once co-habited with dinosaurs, the RIAA says that if you make one copy of a song for yrself, yr a criminal, and the biggest albums of 2007 are from Disney TV soundtracks, game show contestants and Nickelback, I think I’m entitled.
Meanwhile, here in 2008, Team Bush will still be in charge of the free world, the Democrats will still be spineless, and the news media will still be run by the sort of people who run Dateline. So not much to look forward to. Unless you thrive on outrage and run a blog. Then it’s going to be a productive 12 months.
I think I’m turning into George Carlin, personally. I think I’m going to reach a point where I just decide to cancel my membership to the human race, sit back and just enjoy the show – and blog the highlights.
Or maybe I’ll just keep posting YouTube videos and sex robot innovations. Always in motion is the future.
Better luck next year,
This is dF
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
on 2008-01-02 12:53 pm (UTC)no subject
on 2008-01-02 02:28 pm (UTC)'07 felt almost like it should have been one of the 1970's.
puff
no subject
on 2008-01-03 03:46 am (UTC)Sorry for sucking up everyone's fun.
no subject
on 2008-01-02 02:25 pm (UTC)I'm launching No Panties for deFrog '08.
All women should stop wearing panties and wear extremely short skirts to show their support for deFrog's Presidential bid.
So that we can keep track of who is supporting deFrog please take pics and or video of yourself supporting deFrog and send them to puffdoggydaddy@gmail.com.
HA!
And the RIAA is full of shit. Telling people they don't own the personal use rights to something they have purchased is bullshit. From that line of reasoning, you couldn't create personal mixes on your computer or rip the CDs to mp3 for your IPOD or 3-player. Bah!
puff
no subject
on 2008-01-03 05:27 am (UTC)So, I'd say leave the panties on. Cos the last thing I need is some flip-flop label. Thanks for yr understanding.
no subject
on 2008-01-03 05:31 am (UTC)Panties for deFrog '08
puff
no subject
on 2008-01-03 09:29 am (UTC)